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Young, dumb and bored of life

I’m on a gap year. My plan was to get a job, save and eventually travel the world but wow! Finding a job is so hard and without a job my dream of travelling the world is kind of out the window (for the time being anyway). So for the past six weeks I have been sat around doing nothing with my life. My friends are all either at university trying to find themselves for 9k a year or in jobs provided by their family, my boyfriend has gone back to college and my family is all at school or work. My life is kind of pathetic right now.

But this morning, this morning was the moment I actually realised just how sad I was. I sit alone eating cereal in my pyjamas watching cheesy films on Netflix almost EVERY day. Now to some that may sound like a dream but when you had a 10 week summer where you could party with all your friends every week, you saw your other half almost every day and you actually had people around and you’re then thrown into isolation and a life of sloth, you feel like you have nothing. Unfortunately for the people around you, you might end up taking out your frustration on them by starting arguments about how they’re never around and how they don’t have time for you. I know I’m definitely guilty of it. I know it’s purely because I have more time on my hands than they do.
So, I have decided that I am going to do something about it.

I am going to try and lose some weight, indulge myself in photography, try and write myself a novella and maybe, just maybe try and learn how to cook without having to unplug the smoke alarms. I’m even thinking of looking for voluntary work.

I’ve read up on a few people who have been in similar circumstances and they all seem to have everything together now. They’ve started up their own businesses, they’ve made money from writing or inventing and they all just seem so intelligent. I’m not all that bright. I’m life smart rather than book smart. Can being life smart actually get you anywhere? Someone suggested being a motivational speaker. No thank you. I am not okay with telling other people that they are going to be brilliant at something if they just try because it’s not always true. It is so disappointing when you keep trying at something and you never get there. I know that. I’m not okay with lying to people like that. I’m hoping I’ll find my ‘calling’ soon.

Now, I’m no expert on how to change your life but here’s what I’m doing and maybe they’ll help you if you’re in the same boat or you can message me with your suggestions!

– De-clutter your life. Throw out all the clothes you never wear, the gadgets you never use. Just get rid of them! Donate them to charity shops, sell them on eBay, whatever, just stop living with things you don’t need.

– Save money. Put a jar on a shelf and just put whatever money you can into that jar when you can. Save for something fun and exciting. Save for a new experience. Save for something to look forward to.

– Plan. When you wake up, think of things to keep you busy and do them. At the end of the day you don’t want to say “nothing” when someone asks what you’ve been up to.

– Do what you can to feel better. Eat healthier, exercise, sit outside somewhere on your own and read a book or just take in the views.

– Take up a hobby. Find something you’re interested in and do it as much as you can. Develop your skills and find happiness with your own company.

I’m hoping things will improve for me and if you’re in similar shoes then I hope things improve for you too. It’s okay to admit defeat. It allows you to rebuild and make things better for you. You being happier will let the people around you be happier with you too.

Comments

  • Becky Hayes Becky Hayes says:

    I can definitely relate to all of this… It’s so hard to know what to do next (and there’s so many good programmes on Netflix to make you forget about life troubles 😉 )

    • Rachel B Rachel B says:

      I’m so glad I am not the only one! People keep telling me “you’re young, you’re still learning who you are, you can do anything”, HOW LONG DOES SELF DISCOVERY TAKE?! You are certainly correct on the Netflix thing, I have (sadly) watched countless series of tv series which are so bad they’re good!

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