I’ve made a list.
It has all the things I want that I don’t plan on buying myself. So when asked what I want for the holidays by friends, family and secret admirers all they have to do is look at my wish list. I can even send it to you if you like! We live in a wonderful world where the Internet allows us to indulge in all the silly things we don’t need. The holidays gives us an opportunity to take it a step further and make a long list of all the things we’d like NOW! And maybe someone else will get it for us! I don’t think there is anything wrong with knowing what you want, keeping it organised and having an answer for the dreaded questions, “What do you want for (insert gift giving holiday here)?
My husband recently had a birthday. He has a wish list with some of the things he wants but is in no rush to have at this very moment. As a fairly self sufficient man, he tends to buy what he wants when he wants it, but every once in a while he’ll put some items aside to give his family the satisfaction of purchasing a presents for the beloved first born. He’s not one for gifts but we all know what happens when we say we don’t need gifts. Rolling eyes, scoffs and the, you must need something’s… So when the question was asked, the answer was to go to his Internet wish list and pick one of the four items on it. He would’ve loved to get any of the items. As his wife, I was forbidden from purchasing off the wish list so that his family had plenty of options.
His birthday has come and gone and yet, the one thing he really wanted, saved on his wish list for his brother to purchase, is still sitting there waiting to be bought. Instead, the husband received a thoughtful handmade, sports sign. Yay. Sure my husband is a sports fan and sure it was super nice of his brother to spend the time on a thoughtful gift but we are not memorabilia people. We live in a one-bedroom apartment and all the walls are covered with art and bookcases. The sign is the kind of thing you hang in an office, or a man cave, of which we don’t have either. What he really wanted was an X-Box game that he could play with his brother and that’s pretty much it. This kind of things happens all the time too!
People get all bent out of shape about wedding registries. They want to get you something from the heart so you end up with a weird homemade scrap book, or papier-mâché vase when really what you wanted was a set of towels for your bathroom so you could finally throw away the old smelly ones. You provided the perfect idea for a gift that would make you the happiest and you were ignored. And not only that, you’re now stuck with an item that you don’t really want but also can’t get rid of because it was a “special gift.” If I take the time to create a list of things and you would like to buy me a present, please do not stray from the list. It’s there for a reason. No one needs more stuff they don’t have room for, no matter how personal it is.
There are a select few capable of going off list. For me, my mother is an expert gift giver. She knows me so well that no matter what she gets, it’s always useful and something I want (even if I didn’t know it). There’s the friend that always comes through with a great piece of jewelry or a beautiful scarf. She knows the balance between unique and gaudy and somehow you always end up getting your favorite accessories from her. And finally there’s the “gift-carder.” The person who understands that they are a terrible gift giver but knows everyone likes money. I see nothing wrong with the “gift-carder” and have, on occasion, been that person. I’ve never been told by someone they didn’t want a gift card.
Let’s face it, we want what we want. I think most people know that things are just that, things. I don’t need anything. I’m fortunate enough to live in a place where I can actually say with confidence, I truly do not want for anything. I don’t live a lavish life but I’m comfortable. So the things I ask for on my wish list are simply wishes and if I don’t get them that’s fine too. But I really don’t want anymore homemade, heartfelt, crafty gifts. So I beg of you future gift givers of the world, unless it’s edible or cash, please stay on the wish list.
Otherwise a hug will do just fine.
My wishlist can be found on amazon.com if you’re interested 😉