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Silver linings

Positivity

noun

pos·i·tiv·i·ty \ˌpä-zə-ˈti-və-tē\

1 : the quality or state of being positive.

2 : something that is positive.

I, for one, have not been feeling positive lately. I have just over a month to go until my wedding day and even though I do feel happy and excited, I am also juggling last-minute plans, working late four out of five days a week, money troubles and the ongoing battle with my inhibitions.

Not a good basis for positivity.

So I want to try something and I’d like you to try it too, if you ever feel in need of a bit of a lift. Find TEN positives in your life and list them – I mean physically, with a pen and paper or just as a memo on your phone, so you can look at it whenever you need to. I find that writing things down helps me sort them out, the same as writing in a diary and it means I can properly focus on the words. Having a list of all the good things is a great way to remind yourself that it’s not all terrible, even when the world seems bleak.

1) I am alive. This is a cliche, but cliches have to start somewhere. I am grateful that I’m alive and that I get to experience the things I do.

2) I am young. Or at least, I’m young enough to have a big future ahead of me. I’m 23 and although I would have to plan it to within an inch of its life first, I could potentially travel around or change careers or do any number of fun things.

3) I am loved. I have a wonderful fiancé, soon-to-be my husband, who doesn’t put up with my shit but is still there to support me in everything I do.

4) I enjoy my job. I get to write for a living – how cool is that?! Even if sometimes it’s boring stuff about bathroom tiles.

5) I have my own transport. Ernie, aka the CARDIS, my beautiful blue Renault Clio, has recently passed his MOT! Since I got him, I have had SO MUCH more freedom, which really helps with day-to-day life.

6) I have amazing friends. If it were possible to adopt people as your siblings, I would adopt them all as brothers and sisters in a heartbeat. They are wonderful people.

7) I have a fantastic family. After recent heart-wrenching months of stress and arguments and anxiety and not knowing what to say to each other, my mum, dad, brother, and I have finally worked things through. I am grateful for everything they’ve done for me.

8) I am smart and I know how to use it. I may not be brilliant at everything, but I know what I’m good at and I know how to use my knowledge to the best of my ability.

9) I can cook. It may not seem like much, but it’s an incredibly valuable skill. I am so thankful that if I’m hungry, I can just look in the kitchen cupboards and find something that I can make without having to resort to ready-meals all the time.

10) I have my health. Yeah, I weigh a bit more than I’d like to and my chin has a tendency to be covered in those annoying spots where they never actually come to a head, but overall I am a relatively healthy person. I would never take that for granted.

Seriously, try this. Make your list and remind yourself that it’s not all doom and gloom. It really does help.

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