A network for women by women




This is the story of my selfish selfie… it’s a basic selfie, my face looking directly into the camera taken on a holiday in Madrid, Spain.

The picture was taken for two reasons, one was to show off my newly pierced nose and the second and most definitely selfish reason, to feel better… Even though I have the biggest smile across my face, I can tell you this… I am NOT happy… Actually I was feeling close to waterfall-tear nation. I felt terrified , alone and out of place… Residues of a recent separation of a 2 year relationship, the whole reason of the trip and a wound that still burned when I remembered it.
Nothing of those words can be seen in the picture, you can’t see any of the 3 kilos piled up in my belly and hips over the “moving-on” period, or the constant flow of thoughts about never finding love again… All you can see if a happy girl on an amazing holiday with a new piercing… LIE.

After uploading the picture into the different social networks the selfish-selfie happened… I started getting “Likes”-“Comments”-“Retweets”-“Pokes”-“applauses” and cheerful messages… Which brings me to the next phrase:

“What gives us calm and restraint is called IDENTITY”

Growing up, a new job, a new relationship, new friends, new hobbies, and even a nose piercing is a migration of identity, and while you are “migrating” you might experience any of this two very opposite roads, a new and exciting fulfilling migration or a very long, painful and full of anxiety one, but I guess it all comes down to the baggage you are carrying and trust me, in the end it’s worth it! The human spirit is made to transforme, to evolve, to develop!

Back to the selfish selfie, I can’t help it but to remember the Narcissus myth (If you haven’t heard of it, don’t worry, i’m pulling out my greek mythology book and i’m about to share it).

“A Young man named Narcissus, fells in love with his reflection in the water” That’s pretty much the short version, and as far as I know, there are 3 different versions of the end of his story and all 3 are equally tragic.
-“Narcissus is unable to leave the beauty of his reflection; Narcissus dies”
-“Narcissus is unable to find someone close to the beauty of his reflection; Narcissus dies”
-“Narcissus tries to kiss his reflection and falls into the water; Narcissus dies”

So, let’s just say for a moment that a selfie is a mirror and the mirror as one-self is just a reflection… We should be able to see much more tan just our physical features… we should be able to stare deeply into our own eyes and know the most delicate and the most powerful components of ourselves and that is exactly the sole core and perfection we should go for.

We are NOT even the same as the reflection anymore, we are changing within every second… and that’s beautiful! There is a miracle happening and getting ready to be shown to the world! My selfie might not be a happy or even honest one, and as hedonistic as myself might sound, I thank every single person who took their time to write something positive in it, it helped me through a very dark post break-up place and now I find myself liking all the mirrors I can get to, maybe i’m reflecting over some of them and hear me out girls, even if your selfies are being a bit selfish, DON’T WORRY, go out and show the world who you were 5 minutes ago… You are never going to look the exact same AGAIN.


Emma X.


Leave a Reply