A network for women by women




I wish I had been born in the olden days, before ‘pictures or it didn’t happen’.

The times when phones and laptops didn’t exist, let alone the devil – social media.

The times where friends would promise to see each other and hope that they’d both turn up.

The times where the roads were safer and streets were calmer.

The times where you experienced life as it was.

What happened to spontaneity? We no longer look outside the window to check the weather; instead we have BBC weather as a bookmark on our phones, if not that we receive boring weather update statuses on Facebook. Where has the surprise and beauty of this world gone? This is why some older, traditional people refuse to use the Internet. They remember how life was before all this nonsense.

Ok so I’m guilty… I’m guilty for having BBC weather as a favourite on my phone, I’m guilty for being addicted to the Internet and I’m guilty for my posts on social media. Nevertheless, I wish that I wasn’t. We, as human beings, now measure our lives in comparison to others and rely heavily on our phones. Not because life is impossible, but because we have become lazy and go for the convenient routes in life. Take a look at animals. Dogs for instance, they know what the time is without having to rely on a clock. They are happy enough with personal interactions. They don’t need all of the crap that we do.

Social media is a massive migraine.

Every single person that has social media (me being guilty of this, therefore I am a hypocrite in my own mind) posts their great life moments online, but we rarely get to see the bad stuff. There’s those once in a blue moon selfies that make you look like Beyoncé, (never the times when you wake up, all natural after a bad sleep on a Monday morning) the happy photos with your man and posts about how amazing he is, (leaving out the times where you could have hit him round the head with a frying pan and then cooked him in it) the cropped food photos on instagram that look 100 times more appealing than they actually were in real life and the gym posts from fitness freaks portraying a perfect fit and healthy life, when really they probably have fat fail days too.

Its almost like some people really do need to post a picture of them and other people to prove they have friends, or have to write a post about their partner to let Facebook know that they are still with them. It’s sad actually, that most of us, with a few exceptions, are brainwashed into thinking that a social media profile is that person’s real life, when actually, it couldn’t be any more false. So many people brag about their ‘perfect’ lives when really they are probably only convincing themselves. The ones that seem happy could be crying into their pillow at night. Its all so deceiving and I’ve also witnessed malicious posts that try to upset others and posts that are trying to make a personal point, also causing upset, but actually, a Facebook, Twitter or Instagram post should not define any friendships, relationships or happiness. Yet we constantly find ourselves comparing our not-so-perfect lives to other people’s  ‘amazing’ lives.

Why are we living by the rule that we need to post pictures to prove something happened? Why can’t we just embrace the beauties of life that are personal to us, without bragging to the world? There should be more euphoria, over happiness that is your little secret. Funny moments you share with friends that don’t need to be posted online. Cute dates with your partner that just the two of you know about. The little moments in life that make you smile, you should cherish without having to tell Facebook about them.

Now don’t get me wrong, there are some exceptions, for instance if you’re engaged, or if your becoming a mummy, of course you want the world to know! (However, not the whole of your social media circles must know, so maybe change the privacy settings) My mother is also an exception, who with many long term illnesses doesn’t get to see her friends much and spends a lot of time at home. Facebook makes her happy because she has a big community of friends on there that help get her through each day. But exceptions or not, social media is the devil of all devils, the deceiving devil, upsetting us all at one point and sucking on our insecurities. But let’s open our eyes and realise that this is all just one nasty vicious circle of lies that we let control our feelings. Hell no to that, only I will define my life, thanks and I am slowly coming out of this social media addiction. I will not let posts rule my feelings and judgements. I am also slowly starting to feel the euphoria of having special moments with my loved ones that Facebook stalkers don’t know about.

That’s another thing… the quiet little ones on Facebook/ Twitter that don’t post anything. They are still always online though… watching you… reading your posts… judging you… even people you forgot you had on there.

Also, we have stopped living in the now, haven’t we? We look down on our phones, instead of looking at the beautiful areas around us.

Think about all the conversations we missed out on…

Think about all the things we heard but didn’t listen to…

Think about all that we have missed with our eyes, that were built to see…

When really we weren’t seeing anything… other than our phone screens!


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