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Places to go – none, people to see – no one.

So glad to be out of Phoenix and to be leaving the heat, the people and the roads behind. We had a mission; to find a Fourth of July parade and we failed in that mission, but we did find out that people say “happy 4th” to each other. When I first heard it I thought I was special, but soon discovered, I was not. It is nice and festive. We were parked next to an RV, a huge one, it had a flag on it so it may as well have been the moon. We confuse them with buses and we’re only able to tell them apart by whether or not it’s towing a car. I find them really intrusive you know. In some of the prettiest places, there will be an RV blocking the view, with all the people on the inside. Not looking out. I know we aren’t exactly camping, but basically taking your house on holiday kind of defeats the purpose doesn’t it? They must waste so much petrol and money. The people in them are smug too, with their showers and A/C. Well, I bet your holiday was really boring. You didn’t get to learn about a small country named Wales in the queue to the restrooms like the tent camping ladies.

Safford. While RV’s were rife, there was a lake which was cool on our sunburnt bits. There was a thunderstorm nearby, close enough to make a really dramatic swim, but far enough away to not actually be dangerous. They go on about storms a bit here. I think they think some rain is a storm. We sported bikinis for the occasion, because the only person I’m ever going to see from that lake again is Kate and she doesn’t give a fuck how I look. We got out when I unearthed what looked like a chicken bone from the water.

We slept here, it was so much cooler and sleep is hard for me to come by, but we felt so at home
that it was not so difficult. To be honest, our climbing all over the van to get a look at fireworks probably tired us out. We spent only a day here and moved on. That bit’s great. Having all your belongings with you means we don’t have to pack up and can drive away in our pyjamas. That, my friends, is freedom.

Onwards to Deming! New Mexico! Another RV park, but one that has WiFi and separates it’s long term guests and it’s overnight guests. This is now essential after the whole Phoenix thing. It had a pool and a hot tub. We were the most relaxed that we’ve been for a while; hot water is a wonderful thing that is often taken for granted. We discovered Ihop. It’s a pancake place and I was disappointed. Firstly, I think our stomachs have shrunk as we would totally have managed that portion a few weeks ago. Secondly, a dry pancake does not a pancake make.

Las Cruces. We didn’t stay here, we were miles away, but it was the closest town. The campsite, which was halfway up a mountain was only $5, but my God getting up there was a bitch. Straight up the side of a mountain; I thought we’d fall right off. Ceaser is a God amongst vans. Another crappy, but smaller, RV had to be towed up by a giant ass pick up truck. Our yellow van is totally awesome. (Sings) The campsite was incredible. Rustic camping left me a little scared about cougars, but no cats, or recently divorced forty year old women, came up to us. Only foxes and squirrels. Since most people left our site we we truly alone. Vault toilets. As Kate said at the time, “you know the expression flies around shit? Yup.” Gonna be graphic here people, these flies were closer to my ass, than you would ever want a fly to be. But it was worth it. We were shaded under a mountain and I’m not going to gush any more. It was pretty. Although, there was a lot of litter, which was a damn shame. I bet it’s the bitter RV drivers who had to get towed up there in the first place.

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