A few months ago in May this year, my husband and I celebrated our fifth year as a couple…in a few weeks time, we will be celebrating out fourth wedding anniversary! Yes, I can hear you saying that there wasn’t a long time between becoming a couple and getting married…no, actually it was only 6 weeks from the time that we first met to the day that he asked me to be his Wife! Shocked? Well, understandably, a lot of people were, although as soon as our friends and family saw us together they could see that that spark between us, there was no denying that we were meant to be together.
However, as solid as we were as a couple, we faced many hurdles trying to convince others that we really did know what we were doing. Firstly, the speed that our relationship was moving especially since Kevin had just come out of a 10 year relationship; the fact that Kevin has Cystic Fibrosis, which if you look at with no emotion or sensitivity, is a terminal, life shortening condition; and that Kevin is 18 years my senior! 18 years! Yes, really!
Many people were shocked to hear this because Kevin certainly doesn’t look (or act) his age. When he first told me how old he was – he simply said “l am your answer to the ultimate question of life, the Universe and everything.” We laughed as I immediately knew that he was quoting from a favourite film ‘The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy’. “Ah you’re 42 then?!”
This highlighted just one area that Kevin and I shared a strong emotional bond. However, emotional maturity often has little to do with how many years you have lived ~ more on what has happened to you during those years and how it has moulded your life. With me being the more sensible, organised and methodical one, Kevin is the one who makes me laugh with his childlike jokes, silly antics and the excitement of a 10 year old school boy. It’s safe to say that we meet somewhere in the middle when it comes to emotional age!
Another reason that some people discount age gap relationships is for fear that they might not be suited in terms of health and energy. Did I consider Kevin’s Cystic Fibrosis when deciding if I wanted to be in a relationship with him? No, for it was not a conscious decision I could make, the deed was already done, we were already in love and there was nothing we could do about it (not that we wanted to!)
“Age is an issue of mind over matter. If you don’t mind, it doesn’t matter!” ~ Mark Twain. I completely agree. So, should age matter at all? Should we all follow a standard age protocol for falling in love? Well, in my mind, love – old fashioned, head over heels, true love conquers all. All relationships face hurdles that have to be overcome, all marriages need TLC and attention. Love has no age restriction and while people may judge the big age gap, those who are closest to you will only care that you are happy and will see it in your eyes. If you fall in love, age will become irrelevant so try not to confine your matches to a narrow age bracket…and give the oldies a chance! 😉
May Cupid guide you this year and help you take that leap of faith to find love with someone who might just be your Mr or Mrs Right! xxx