A network for women by women




This article may have come to me because spring is slowly and begrudgingly peaking out of the shadows of winter. There is solid cloud masking my skylight window and thick, heavy raindrops battering the glass. Warm summer evenings, fancy al fresco lunches and free flip flop feet seem years away right now.

It’s no wonder I need ‘cheering up’. Upon reading the next few paragraphs, you may feel I do.

Or do I? Is there real shame in finding solace in a sombre state?

In the last few months, my mind has become awash with work, home, health and general stresses that life likes to test us with. Whilst nothing I have come across has been a hurdle I couldn’t climb over eventually, everyday life stresses can build up to test our strength and mood.¬†And this is life. It’s not always nice to actually think about but real life is not always chrome filtered landscape shots and clinking champagne glasses under the stars. It’s not excitable drunken selfies and trendy frothy coffee tops.

Don’t get me wrong, I certainly like to grasp the positive spin on life whenever I can. We are on this beautiful earth once and we must seize the opportunity and every moment we can, but what if this isn’t possible every single waking moment?

Social media has dictated a society in which we must showcase our latest and greatest achievements. Scrolling through my newsfeed I see images of sun-kissed legs stretching over golden sand, glorious sunset scenes in far flung hideaways around the globe and beautiful healthy babies with their proud parents. It’s refreshing to see where my peers have taken their life and celebrate their achievements with them and whilst this is a fantastic way to feel great for others and share with friends, it makes it even harder to admit when the going gets tough.

So should we continue to mask our troubles out of focus in the snapshots of our life? Or should we embrace the roller-coaster that it is?

Of course we wouldn’t feel comfortable sharing our inner most thoughts online and I don’t believe we should broadcast some of the harder moments we go through, but those that are brave enough to share some of their hardships as well as their success are branded as attention-seeking. It is seemingly so wrong to seek attention and comfort in times of need and yet focus on our triumphs is never deemed boastful.

Social media may not be the only medium in which we must masquerade our weaknesses. An act of deception is almost necessary in reality when you are ‘in a mood’ or ‘down in the dumps’. Being in a mood becomes an accusation at the end of a pointed finger, as if shame should envelope it. The waves of emotion we go through each day are what make life so exhilarating. We must fight through the hardships to appreciate and enjoy the light.

I have often been called a “moody cow” if I’ve found myself some peace in a silent moment at the office and yet it is these very moments which allow me to think clearly and find a way through whatever problem it is. Accusations of this sort only swallow us up further and make the struggle back to our happy selves even stickier.

So why must we accuse somebody in this way? We don’t accuse somebody of being excited. We don’t accuse somebody of being determined. And we certainly wouldn’t accuse somebody of grieving. An understanding into why somebody may be feeling a certain way may not always be possible, but an acceptance certainly should be.

So next time a friend, colleague, sister or husband is feeling low, we must first consider why they may be feeling that way find our own path to improving their disposition. And when you feel the same way, embrace it. Let us capture every emotion we go through each day. Let us appreciate the light and the dark and let the kaleidoscope of moods transport us through life with ease, not with fear of what others think of our temperament.


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