Today’s dose of our weekly column ‘From the Mouths of Men’, is in response to Charlie Brogan’s article Ban the Bitch.
One sentence synopsis of original article: the writer disparages the culture whereby woman are naturally inclined to ‘bitch’ about one another in order to make ourselves feel better and goes on to encourage us to join with her in her proclamation of ‘no more bitching’.
Best Bit: “stop talking about other women negatively, stop bringing women down, do not surround yourself with people who bitch relentlessly, in fact, just stop talking about other people full stop.”
The feedback: A positive response to this piece, with this lady commenting, “Very inspiring!! Love this article, if only us women could be strong together rather than constantly criticising one another!”
From the mouths of men.
So as always I begin collating my responses with the view of hubby, who as luck would have it had a timely anecdote on the matter.; “I was walking the dog earlier and saw this woman on the phone, just bitching about the girls in her office the entire time,” he told me, grinning what I can only assume to be a ‘you ladies are such bi-atch-is” kind of way.
He went on to admit, “I think men do it to, just not in the same degree.” I confess I myself have been known to verbalise the odd witticism at the expense of others of my gender, so actually I expected worse from hubby. It seems however the ‘bitchiness of women’ is not an easy one to call.
This lad seemed to agree that it’s not just women, but that women are just ‘better’ at bitching for want of a more appropriate word;
“I think women are much worse than men for bitching and gossiping but certainly not all women (call it 90%). I think men do gossip, but it’s not as bitchy as women’s gossip and men are more likely to say it to each other’s faces and get it over with, whereas women rarely confront each other.”
Whereas this man went straight for the kill;
“Yes they are more bitchy. Much more so than men. They slag off each other’s hair, clothes etc much more than a bloke would.”
I have seen men comment on fashion disasters of their peers. It usually consists of, “take that shirt off mate, you like a right twat.”Women on the other hand rarely have the nerve to say to someone’s face they look awful but will gladly do so to their partners “did you see what she was wearing?!” Sad, but true.
It’s not all doom and gloom however, this gent must be on to a winner with his woman, because his resounding response was; “I don’t think it’s true that all women are like that.”
And this chap elaborates further;
“ I don’t think all women are bitchy but perhaps women generally have a tendency to talk about their thoughts and feelings more than we men do, which can be seen us gossip/slander.”
Thank you so much that Mouths of Men! I can now bitch as much as I like about other women and when I get called out on it, respond,“I wasn’t bitching, just expressing my feelings on the matter.” Brilliant!
There is even debate on what is classed as bitchiness, with one man responding, “what I would class as being a bit bitchy before is down right horrible now”-perhaps there is a change in perception as we cross age barriers?
It seems that in general men don’t perceive women to be nearly as bitch as we perceive ourselves (or as we in fact are). This lad in particular, didn’t agree with the generalisation, saying; “I don’t think it is correct to put it as such as one dimensional stereotype. It’s down to personality rather than gender”.
Following this however, one likely lad gives advice on how to solve the ‘bitchiness of women’;
“It’s nothing that team sport and a couple of beers couldn’t sort out”. There you have it ladies, if you do think you fit this category, some sound words of wisdom From the Mouths of Men.
As you may have noticed by now, I like to finish on my favourite quote, so here goes it. A ‘Confucius say’ kind of response; “Women don’t have real friends, they just have some women they hate less than others.”
You have to grin at that one lady, whether it rings true or not! Now if you’ll excuse me I’ll get back to listening to my Ipod..
I’m a bitch, I’m a lover, I’m a child, I’m a mother
I’m a sinner, I’m a saint, I do not feel ashamed
I’m your hell, I’m your dream, I’m nothing in between
You know you wouldn’t want it any other way…