I have never had a lot of money and still don’t to this day. From the age of 12 I worked and earnt money, it was only babysitting but I was lucky they went out on a regular weekly basis. Saturday nights consisted of watching 3 children who I totally adore and have very fond memories off. And if I was lucky they went out Friday night too which meant I was £20 up instead of 10. But I was very grateful. Being the oldest child out of 7 things were limited. At 13 I got a part time job in a toy store which gave me extra money. I loved my jobs and the bit of money it gave me. It meant the adidas trainers I wanted I could get. As the options were £10 cheap ones my mum could afford or £30 ones I could afford with my money. So I was able to be a little trendy and not feel embarrassed about not having cool things like many other children at school. How times have changed the cheaper the better now and brands are so not important either.
Fast forward a few years I had left school at 16 and had a full time job in the toy shop. My wage wasn’t massive but for still living at home and paying a small amount of housekeep I was still able to save and buy the essentials I needed. By 18 I had moved out had a different job and the saving stopped. Paying rent, food, clothing, nights out there just wasn’t enough left to save and by the age of 20 I had used all my savings. Silly now when I look back but I suppose it’s an experience of growing up.
Happily married for 4 years, together for 7 years, 3 boys, and unfortunately a public sector house, money is extremely tight. Which I am sure a lot of you can relate and what a horrific strain it puts on your relationship. Now I don’t believe money buys you happiness but it certainly makes life a lot bloody easier. My husband has a substantial job with a normal average wage and I unfortunately have a little part time position which is all about useless doesn’t help contribute much at all but the thought is, I am more likely to be employed if I have a job. Nothing else has worked for the last 18 months so may as well give this ago. So after the husband being made redundant last year and myself trying to gain employment after staying at home with our boys, we are still trying to get back on our feet and it’s a constant battle for us. Continuous arguments who hasn’t paid this, I didn’t pay that, do you know what is in your account?! What is due to come out? Every day I check my online banking even though I haven’t sent any money or nothing has come out of my account. Its habit now. My husband on the other hand never checks his account has no idea apart from the obvious bills that come out after pay day and this is another battle. I nag and I mean nag at him to check all the time and he very rarely does to which a few days later a letter will turn up on the door step to say he is over drawn!! Well this does not bode well is the nicest way to put it. Any other women deal with this?
So tonight was my last straw after the last few days of closely watching our funds to get a letter at the door, which I wasn’t aware was coming due to either crossed wires or the case my husband is a complete utter idiot and thought he may get away with it! So I have taken charge of all accounts all passwords and all bank cards. Now I am not saying I am going to be any better, well yes actually I am let’s not beat around the bush here. I will sort this or at least keep things in better order to know where and when our money is going.
I love my husband dearly and he works extremely hard for myself and the boys so I see this as I am helping him out and let me deal with it. Though I think after tonight’s arguments he doesn’t see it like that.
I would love to hear from anyone else and any tips they may have or if anything else have a rant about our husbands.