When people ask me if I have children it is usually followed by “And when are you having another”? When I answer “Its just the one for us” people usually give me the look of bewilderment or disbelief. The assumption that I reproduced once therefore must again annoys me not only because its not through choice that I am not having anymore children but rather health reasons but also because I feel judged and that my child is some how missing out from not having a sibling.
Having just the one child within today’s society is not the same as it was two generations ago. When I was growing up the only children in my class usually had mothers of a certain age and they were the product of a twilight moment in their senior years. Nowadays people are choosing to have just the one child for a number of reasons.
Within a society where the economy is unstable at its best and retirement age is ever increasing so the option of free child care from grandparents is no longer available some parents are choosing to have just the one as the expense of having more in unthinkable.
Fertility treatments are so more advanced today that more people who would have normally not been able to be parents are able to conceive naturally through IVF so the option to have more children is not their choice if they are unable to afford the expense of having to fund a second treatment.
Some people just want one child it’s as simple as that.
I feel all children are a blessing, I have been blessed to have my son a baby that I never expected to have. Im not going to risk my life to have another baby to fit in with a image of the perfect two point four family unit. Families as do people come in all shapes and sizes some are conventional and others aren’t I just wish I didn’t have to justify my choice of just the one.