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Parenting

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Are you failing as a mum?

I can say with some confidence that you probably aren’t. The fact that you care enough to contemplate it suggests that you are a parent who utilises the worst experiences to make changes for a better future.

Every parent in the world will have had times when they have doubted their abilities. Every parent will have got to the end of a day, close to tears, mad at their children and mad at themselves.

Please remember that you are not defined by those few bad days. We all have them. There is not going to be any long lasting damage from one bad day here and there.

Take a breath and remember to believe in yourself. It is true that without the hard times, we cannot appreciate the good. Very few people sail through life on a cloud of perfection, I certainly don’t know any but you hear rumours about such folk.

Having a bad day and feeling like a failure, doesn’t actually make you a failure. Do not chastise yourself for not handling things well. We are not given a manual to guide us through every challenging situation which comes our way. Parenting is complex and everyone’s experience is different. There could never be such a manual. Just like you can never compare your experiences to anyone else’s.

Rid your mind of any idealistic pictures that you may have. Embrace who you are. Learn your strengths and recognise your weaknesses. Learn to let go of the things you can’t control.

Why was it a bad day? If you are conscientious enough to recognise that there was a problem you will already be subconsciously brainstorming how to prevent it reoccurring. There it is again, proof that you are not a failure.

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