December is undoubtedly the most stressful month in the year for anyone. Busy towns, a long list of Christmas presents, money going down the drain and needing to please even those you aren’t too fond of.
For me, you’d think that this year’s December was my dream. I turned 21 on the 23rd and two days later it was Christmas. I finished my semester at university and had many celebrations to look forward to. However, December was no dream for me. It was a full on nightmare. With sleepless nights throughout, a dodgy tummy, a constant sick feeling in my stomach/chest, being on edge 24/7 and thinking intrusive thoughts that I couldn’t get rid of. December is my favourite, but worst time of year and the time when my anxiety and social anxiety bites me harder than usual. Severe anxiety turns into major meltdown anxiety.
When you suffer with an anxiety condition, there’s hardly any break. At Christmas time it’s even worse because you have no hope in hell of relaxing for a little while, due to the wild activity going on in your brain.
It’s really hard to express this to someone that doesn’t know what it feels like because there will always be a misunderstanding. We may not look forward to Christmas as much as others and that can be interpreted as such a crime. Us anxiety sufferers are labelled as pessimists. Ok, so we are pessimists sometimes, as we are experts in coming to the worst conclusions, but that’s not always who we are. In fact, we can be very optimistic people who love our lives, when we can, and are grateful with what we have.
So my thoughts are with those with anxiety conditions, their loved ones and those with any health conditions that prevented them from fully enjoying Christmas. I hope that you were all able to have a lovely week of festivities despite the suffering.